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Showing posts from 2018

Single Story Video: Depression

https://youtu.be/RkHwsKhn07k Despite the fact that the process of creating this video was stressful and exhausting, I'm really pleased with how it came out. I struggled for the longest time to come up with an idea. I actually had one idea that I was going to do that I ended up changing at the last minute (see my storyboard in my portfolio). It was important to me that I handle the subject matter delicately. I knew what message I wanted to get across, but I didn't know how to bring that message to screen in a way that way tactful and honest. The message I wanted to emphasize is that you don’t have to be constantly exhibiting/experiencing the diagnostic criteria/stereotypical aspects of depression to be struggling. It was important for me personally, and for my single story development, to accept that someone can be outwardly happy and still struggling internally. I realized that a depressed person can feel happiness without it invalidating their mental illness. In other words,

Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins

Another place where Katniss's depression is extremely obvious is after Prim's death at the end of the novel.  "I badly need help working this out, only everyone I trust is dead. Cinna. Boggs. Finnick. Prim. There's Peeta, but he couldn't do any more than speculate, and who knows what state his mind's in, anyway.And that leaves onlyGale. He's far away, but even if he were beside me, could I confide in him? What could I say, how could I phrase it, without implying that it was his bomb that killed Prim? The impossibility of that idea, more than any, is why Snow must be lying."

Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins

Katniss's depression in Mockingjay is subtle, but very present. I remember reading Mockingjay as a teen and not noticing Katniss's depression because as a reader and fan of the series, I was caught up in the excitement and wonder of wanting to find out what happens next. One place where Katniss's depression felt especially present was during one of her early interactions with President Coin, President of District 13. Coin has been ensured that Katniss will "act" as the Mockingjay for their rebellion, but Katniss is over it. Peeta has been captured by the Capital and Katniss, confined to district 13, doesn't have much to do/work toward. She is at the mercy of President Coin, yet bargains with her. She proposes an ultimatum. She demands immunity for Peeta, being allowed to hunt, getting to keep Prim's cat, and her killing Snow. She proposes an ultimatum without much care or thought. She doesn't care about her own safety. She just wants to seek vengeance 

Depression: A Very Short Introduction

On page 22-23,  Depression: A Very Short Introduction includes an example of the diagnostic criteria for major depression. The diagnostic criteria is as follows: Five (or more) of the following symptoms have been present during the same two-week period and represent a change previous functioning at least one of the symptoms is either (1) depressed mood or (2) loss of interest or pleasure.  depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, as indicated by subjective or observer reports markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day insomnia or hypersomnia nearly every day psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day (observable by others, not merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down) fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappr

Depression: A Very Short Introduction

I got this nonfiction book, titled Depression: A Very Short Introduction , in an attempt to try to understand some of the why behind depression. One chapter I found interesting was titled, "Who is at risk of depression?" Those at highest risk of depression... depression is most prevalent in those who are economically disadvantaged rates of depression in women are consistently found to be 2x that of men loss of a partner by death, divorce, etc. increases rates of depression highest risk of suicide are those age 15-24 and those over 65 years of age 5% of the global population will be depressed at any one time & 15% of the global population will experience depression at some point in their lifetime average age of onset of depression is mid to late 20s according to the World Health Organization, someone commits suicide every minute  "Most individuals with depression can and do recover from their illness episode and, even if they experience further relapses,

Depression & Other Magic Tricks by Sabrina Benaim

This following poem made me think about how depression can make you unrecognizable both to yourself and to those you love. You might become a caricature of yourself, so at first, they notice nothing wrong. By the time they realize you aren't okay or fine or alright or any of the other pleasantries you've been claiming to be, they can't understand what happened or where the person who they know you as went.  the other side of a  memory  we could have told you  she wasn't herself since the tenth  grade  sure, she still had a laugh like  electricity  still went to dance class  put on mascara each morning for  school  but something was off  something like how a light switch  will still turn on  a half burnt bulb  it was hard to tell if she was a  stubborn surge  or a tired, dimming circuit  then she started working  weekends  stopped making it for dinner on  Sundays  when she did she looked  exhausted  but she was always missing our  calls  tel

Depression & Other Magic Tricks by Sabrina Benaim

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"Depression & Other Magic Tricks" is a collection of poetry by Sabrina Benaim. Most of the poems regard her depression. One of the first poems in the collection is called "explaining my depression to my mother a conversation ." I included a video of her performing this poem below. I found it to be really powerful. Her anxiety is palpable and the mood is tense. This poem made me think about the different ways in which those with depression are affected by how their families/loved ones interact with them due to their depression. Sabrina's poem is about conversation with her mom about her depression. I found the poem to be quite sad. Her mom doesn't quite get it, but seems to want to help. She gives advice, but the wrong advice. You can tell she doesn't view depression as an illness or a disease, but as something that you get over, something you get over by lighting candles or going out. Her mom even says, "happy is a decision." I think t

Shoot the Damn Dog: A Memoir of Depression by Sally Brampton

This memoir is full of memorable quotes (and I highlighted something on almost every page), but for this post, I went back through all my highlights and chose the 3 quotes that were really impactful to me. "Life is about connection. There is nothing else." (p. 1) "The truth? The truth was that I wanted, passionately, to be dead. How do you tell your best friend that?" (p. 93)  "It is the glass wall that separates us from life, from ourselves, that is so truly frightening in depression." (p. 171) All of these quotes are impactful, but it was number 3 that really stuck with me. It was running through my head weeks after I put down Sally's memoir. The way she captures being stuck, being separated led me to have a visceral response. This idea that someone who is depressed might be looking out from their depression, aware that they are depressed, but can do nothing to reach through the glass to others is terrifying . She captures the extreme lone

It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizinni

One thing that struck me as interesting about It's Kind of a Funny Story  is Craig's willingness to seek help. He takes his medication and participates in therapy; and when he's feeling suicidal, he calls the National Suicide Hotline and takes their advice to go check himself into the hospital. From the reading I've done for my single story, I've come to realize that there isn't one presentation of depression, but it's still impressive that a teen felt brave/comfortable enough to call the hotline and check himself into the hospital. Having depression can make it difficult to seek help. Those who are depressed may convince themselves that they don't need help or might be too scared to seek help. I'm glad that a young adult novel showed that seeking help is the right thing to do. It's so important that we destigmatize mental health for young people. Especially when, as of 2016, suicide is the second leading cause of death for those aged 10-24 in t

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

I read this book back in the beginning of the semester, but I wanted to come back to it and respond to some of the questions that Professor Cole posed in her comment on my first post. The significance of the title is that Esther, the main character, feels as if she's trapped in a bell jar . She feels cut off from the outside world and starved for air. She feels trapped by her own mind and depression and she feels as if there's a world going on around her that she can't access. From what I've learned about depression through The Bell Jar , It's Kind of a Funny Story , and Shoot the Damn Dog: A Memoir of Depression , the bell jar metaphor is a pretty good metaphor for how people with depression often feel.  In regards to how I feel about the text beyond the story it tells, I enjoyed Plath's writing. It was poetic and subtle in its beauty. She didn't use overly big or impressive words, but her word choice always felt spot on. It was impactful writing without

Shoot the Damn Dog: A Memoir of Depression by Sally Brampton

Before I started writing this, I looked up Sally Brampton, the author of this memoir, to see what she was up to. I found out that she passed away in 2016 from what is thought to have been suicide.  This isn't what I originally  plan to write about, but after learning of her death, I was shocked. I think learning of her death really solidified for me that depression is a true disease. Sally did everything she was supposed to do when you have depression. I'm not quite done with the memoir, but so far she had tried countless medications, went to various therapists, and had worked hard to get better during her multiple stays in psychiatric hospitals. She was resisting using alcohol to numb her depression, had safety plans in place for when she felt bad, and  had close, supportive friends.  She talked about how she utilized meditation, exercise, and therapy to combat her depression. Despite doing everything "right," she still lost her battle. Depression is just like any ot

It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini

It's Kind of a Funny Story is a first-person narration from the point-of-view of Craig, a 16-year-old boy living in NYC. Craig is depressed, and it shows from the first line of the novel: "It's so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself."  One thing that really interested me about Craig as a character is that he oscillates between thinking that he is severely depressed, and worse off than everyone around him, and thinking that he's just inventing his own depression. I think this could be a symptom of the depression itself, or perhaps comes from who Craig is as a person, or perhaps it might have to do with his age.   The quotes below display Craig's tendency to have contrasting thoughts about his depression   On needing medication: "I don't know if they really need it. I really need it." When he starts improving in the psychiatric ward: "I'm not that much better, man." On others with depression: "I'

Tech Mini-Lesson Reflection

For my mini-lesson, I showed the class how to use Piktochart . I chose to work with Piktochart because it is a tech tool that I use regularly in my life. I've used it to my cards, posters, newsletters, and more, and I also use it often for homework assignments.  Before my mini-lesson, I made a detailed plan that included  how and why  I wanted to teach my classmates to use Piktochart. I found that having a plan really helped, because during my mini-lesson I knew exactly how I wanted to use my time. My plan included steps that built on each other, so it was easy to move from one step to the next to make sure I talked about everything that I wanted to in my allotted time.  It was hard to keep my lesson to 10 minutes, but that was only because I wanted to include sufficient time for my classmates to play around with the program themselves.  Overall, I think my mini-lesson went well. I could have been a little more engaging, but I'm happy with the fact that I demoed a practica

"A Time to Talk" by Robert Frost - Digital Poetry Interpretation

https://youtu.be/ssWXEm7TLBE For the most part, I enjoyed working on this project. I think I took somewhat of a different approach to thinking about this project when it was assigned, which, as a result, impacted how my final video turned out. Way back when the video was assigned, instead of finding a poem I enjoyed or knew I wanted to work with, I thought about what I would enjoy filming. I just transferred schools, and while my best friend from high school goes here, I was really worried about making other friends. But her friend group instantly took me in, and now, even though it's only been two months, I've never had such a close group of friends. So, when this project was assigned, I knew I wanted to film them and to create something that represented all the fun we have together. Knowing this, I started looking for a poem that would fit what I wanted to film. I probably spent a good week looking for a poem that I liked about friendship. I liked A Time to Talk becau

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

This was my first time reading The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. As for my first impressions, it was a difficult book to get through. The writing wasn't difficult, but I found that reading the book altered my mood. It's a sad book, and I guess I wasn't expecting to be so effected by reading it. Having heard it was a sad book before I read it, but not knowing anything else, I was surprised by the normalcy of Esther's life in the first couple of chapters. There are hints that she's unhappy but they can be interpreted as just everyday, "normal" moments of unhappiness. But things quickly escalate. At the start of the second half on the novel, Esther makes her first suicide attempt. It was difficult to read, but maybe not for the reasons I expected. It was off-putting how nonchalant Esther was at attempting to take her own life. This is one of the many points in the novel that made me realize that depression can alter not only how you feel but how you act. This is

Dr. Robert Bullard Convocation

Dr. Bullard's convocation lecture was a lot to take in. The evidence to back up the fact that people of color and people of lower socio-economic status are systematically affected by environmental problems (both within our control and out of our control) is astounding. Dr. Bullard showed us slide after slide that displayed how people in the poverty belt are more likely to have inadequate access to necessities like clean air and water, are more likely to suffer from specific diseases/health issues, and are more likely to have a lower life expectancy. While his talk was fantastic at identifying various environmental problems that affect marginalized groups, I wish he had spoke more about how we can become advocates and how we can enact change. It's an overwhelming problem. It's a problem that has history and involves corporations and the government targeting specific groups. How do you rectify all that history and ensure that it doesn't continue to happen? 

McVee, Bailey, and Shanahan Response

First off, I loved the concept of the Gumby maneuver. It’s important for teachers to be able to stay flexible in general, but it’s especially important when dealing with technology. There’s so much that can go wrong with technology that it’s always important to have a plan B. I can think back to instances in high school when the technology wasn’t working how my teacher wanted, and it either ate up class time, or just lead to us not doing much that class period. In the future, I think it’d be smart when making lesson plans that include technology to include a back-up plan in case the technology doesn’t work how I want it to.  I also liked the point about working with technology that frustrates or scares you. I don’t want to be the type of teacher who shies away from using technology just because they’re scared of it. There’s so many ways to incorporate technology into the classroom in beneficial ways. In the future, I hope to actively look for technology that I can incorporate

The Ed Tech Transformation

I think it's unfortunate that technology has the potential to change the way we do/think about school for the better, but schools aren't, on a nationwide scale, embracing technology. I think part of the reason why is unequal access to technology, teachers being slow to accept change, and teachers simply not knowing how to incorporate technology into their classrooms. I don't think teachers should take all the blame for not knowing  how to incorporate technology  into their classrooms. There's so much technology now and it's hard to keep up. I think schools should prioritize training their teachers on how to make the most of the technology they have at their disposal.  As for teaching students how to use ed tech in social-justice work, I was really interested by the work of Antwi Akom. I like the concept of "bottom-up research" in which students and and young people on the ground, document their everyday experiences. Streetwyze has the potential to make r

Lessons from History / The Digital Divide

I was surprised at the ways in which technology has been present in English curricula over the past 100 years. I thought the introduction of technology into teaching was a more recent development. I guess I think of technology as things like laptops and tablets and forget that radio and film were new forms of technology once. I personally think that incorporating technology into the classroom is a great way to get student engaged with the course material. McCorkle and Palmeri found that in many of the English Journal articles teachers felt this way too: “teachers valued new media because they viewed them as more engaging for students.” My high school had laptop and tablet carts that teachers could reserve for lessons. I remember that the class was always super excited on the days we got to use those carts. I think my high school is now a one-to-one school where each student gets a chromebook. I wonder how students engagement with technology has changed now that they each have a laptop

Thoughts on "The Danger of a Single Story"

I think Chimamanda Adichie’s TED Talk was beneficial to watch as a future teacher. I thought it was especially important to think about how certain stories are represented in literature. Like Adichie said, often American/British literature focus on one type of person--white, attractive, thin, etc. All students should have the chance to see themselves in what they are reading in one way or another. Students should also be represented in what they are reading fully , and not just as a stereotype. I really liked the quote, “The single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete.” I feel like I have often been told that the issue with stereotypes is that they are untrue, and that it’s problematic to view someone or someplace in a way that isn’t truthful. I like that Adichie rejects this and states that stereotypes can contain truth, but that the real problem is that they aren’t complete. I think we all sometimes d

Thoughts on the Syllabus

I’m excited to work in a workshop model where all of our projects and experiences will build on each others. As someone who is slightly tech-deficient, but always enjoyed class projects that incorporated technology, I’m also really excited to learn new tools and new ways to incorporate technology into my future classroom. I also like that we will be reading works of literature that we might teach one day. One of my goals for this class is to work consistently and avoid procrastination. I’m worried about my workload this semester so I need to manage my time and make sure I’m keeping up with everything.